509 WII.FM Exclusive On The Deep Wealth Podcast

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Introduction and Episode Overview

Jeffrey Feldberg: Deep Wealth Nation welcome to another episode of the Deep Wealth Podcast. This is a solo episode and a very special one. Let me start by asking you a question. Have you ever walked away from a conversation thinking, wow, that really should have gone better? But for some reason it didn't, and you have no idea why.

There wasn't an argument, there wasn't an obvious mistake on the business side maybe the deal stalled, or maybe your team member nodded, but nothing changed, or the customer gave you pushback on all the areas, especially price. 

Understanding the Signal You Broadcast

Jeffrey Feldberg: Let me share something with you that most entrepreneurs never realize.

In every conversation believe it or not, you're broadcasting a signal. This signal is not with words. It's with your intention and every human on the planet, we are all tuned into the same station.

Do you know the world's favorite radio station?

It's WII.FM.

The Power of WII.FM

Jeffrey Feldberg: In our mastery program, Deep Wealth Mastery and the 9-Step Roadmap, we talk all about [00:01:00] WII.FM, which stands for What's In It For Me, but sadly, most people, they're tuning into the what's in it for them instead of the what's in it for the other person that you're speaking to. Now, Deep Wealth Nation, this is not your fault. It's part of the human condition where we're looking out for ourselves, we're looking out for number one, right?

Actually, it's all wrong, and it doesn't have to be that way. When you master this one skill, you take your game and your life to another level.

In this episode, I will show you how to hear that station in every conversation. How to shift from ME.FM to WII.FM in a way that's not manipulative. And why? When you expect absolutely nothing in return, it actually makes you more persuasive.

And this is how intention becomes an invisible language that people feel before they even hear or understand your words.

If you're building to keep your business forever, [00:02:00] this will help you reduce friction and increase your profits. If you're building to one day, hopefully sell your business, this will help you reduce the risk and increase your enterprise value.

Once you hear this, you'll never hear conversations the same way again.

So what do you say, should we do it? Amazing. Let's do it.

Identifying the Missing Element

Jeffrey Feldberg: So before we go any further, I want to make sure that you know exactly who this episode is for. This is for the entrepreneur who is smart, capable, and doing a lot of things right, yet at the same time, you're still thinking, why does this feel harder than it should?

You're taking the calls, you're watching the numbers, you're carrying the payroll, clients and decisions that can't be outsourced, and yet, the deals stall after conversations that felt solid.

You thought, yes, I'm making progress. Or customers push back on price even when the value is clear as day. Team members agree in meetings, yet the execution quietly drops, and sometimes it feels like you're the only adult in the room holding [00:03:00] the weight of the business. If that's you, let me be clear. You are not broken, you are not behind, and you are definitely not alone.

What's missing is not a better pitch. It's not a different strategy. It's not a tighter script or another tactic. It's awareness of a signal that you're broadcasting and you're not even realizing it. It's a signal that shapes how people respond to you before the logic and your words even show up. And this matters whether you're building or selling your business.

If you're building to keep, you want profit, stability and a business that helps to fund your lifestyle and your life, but not consuming your life. And if you're building to sell down the road, you want the same profits, but you also want leverage, enterprise value and a company that works without you being the glue.

The Importance of Trust and Emotional Connection

Jeffrey Feldberg: So today I'm going to give you a very clear way to hear that signal clearly, and I'm going to warn you in advance once you see it, you can never unsee it.

Let me share [00:04:00] something with you that on the surface may not make sense, but hey, I don't make the rules. This is how it is.

The person who wins is not the person with the best pitch. Think of all the smart people that you know. They're incredibly talented, yet maybe in life they're just not winning the way that they should because a person who wins, it's the one who makes the other person feel understood faster than anyone else.

Think about it.

People remember not what we say but how we make them feel.

And that matters because for most high performing entrepreneurs, we're trained to believe the opposite. We're trained to believe, hey, if I'm clear, they're going to get it. If I'm logical, the other person will agree. If I show enough value, it's a done deal, they will buy. And if I work harder, it is all going to work out.

And sometimes it does, but it's like going to your favorite casino and you're going on the slot machines. Every now and again, you'll get those cherries and you have a payout. But more times than not, it doesn't work out. But if you ever had a conversation where everything felt right, the [00:05:00] proposal went out, and then nothing happened, you already know there's something else going on.

Perhaps the other party is saying, hey, that looks great, or, let me think about it. Or we just need to align internally. And then like a thief in the middle of the night, the deal disappears. Or maybe you're leading your team and wondering.

Why do I have to repeat myself?

Why does urgency vanish the moment I leave the room?

Why does ownership feel optional?

Or you look at your customers and you're thinking, how did we become a commodity?

We're delivering, we care, we're showing up, and yet they're still squeezing us on price.

Let me name the real cost of this, not just revenue. It's not the revenue that you're losing or that you should have had, but you're not going to get.

It's the mental tax.

It's walking around with open loops you can't shut off. It's carrying the emotional load of the business quietly. It's feeling pressure. You can't easily bring home or talk through.

And I'll share with you what makes it worse. [00:06:00] When you don't understand why you didn't achieve your goal, why conversations stall, you start compensating in all the wrong ways. You talk more, you explain more, you discount, you chase, you overdeliver, you try harder to be impressive instead of just yourself.

And every one of these feel productive in the moment, but don't confuse activity with being productive because every one of these actions, it erodes trust in the long term because people feel something that you're not saying they can feel when you want something from them.

And the moment they feel that even if you're ethical and competent, their guard goes up.

And this is why WII.FM is not a clever concept. It's not some kind of a gimmick, it's a profit lever, it's a leadership lever. And if you're building to sell, it's an enterprise value lever.

Because trust, it's not a soft skill. Trust is the very thing that makes everything move faster.

So let's define this clearly, WII.FM stands [00:07:00] for What's In It For Me, and let's slow down intentionally for just a moment because the second most entrepreneurs hear that phrase, they resist it. They think manipulation. They think, hey I'm not this sleazy salesperson. They think tactics. They think, so this is how I get people to do exactly what I want.

But actually this is not what it is.

WII.FM is not a trick. It's not a script. It's not a way to steer people. WII.FM. It's an operating system. Most people walk into conversations asking one silent question:

what do I want?

And how do I get it?

Now there's nothing wrong with that. Again, that's the human condition.

When you master WII.FM, you begin to ask a different set of questions.

Things like, what does the person I'm speaking to, what do they want right now?

What are they trying to protect?

What are they afraid of? What does winning look like for them?

And what do they need to believe in [00:08:00] order to move forward?

And here's what I want you to remember, WII.FM, it's not about being that nice person who's saying things just for the sake of saying things. It's about being accurate because the fastest way to build trust, it's not charm, it's precision. It's understanding someone else's reality.

Now let me be very clear about what WII.FM is absolutely not. Because you may be thinking, well, Jeffrey, I have integrity and I do think of other people. I'm going to give you some pushback on that. Fair enough. But hear me out. WII.FM is not people pleasing. It's not shrinking, it's not pretending you don't want anything and it's not discounting your value to make someone comfortable.

You can still be direct. You can still hold your very high standards and you can still say no. The difference is where you're leading from. Think about that. That's very subtle. The difference is where you're leading from. When you lead with ME.FM, your clarity [00:09:00] carries pressure.

When you lead with WII.FM, your clarity carries safety.

Let me say that one more time.

When you lead with the What's In It For Me, but from the other person's perspective, your clarity, that conveys safety, that conveys trust. Because people don't resist clarity. They do resist pressure. They resist feeling pressured to do something they don't want to do. Or being conned or with a gimmick, whatever the case may be.

And here's the paradox that changes everything.

The more someone feels you're trying to win against them, the more they're going to resist, the more they're going to shut down and push back. You've all been there. Think of those conversations you're trying to impose your will over the other person.

The more someone feels that you're trying to help them win. On the flip side of this, the more they will follow your lead, the more they're thinking, hey, yeah, Jeffrey, you hear me. You get it. I like what I'm seeing. I like what I'm hearing.

[00:10:00] This is WII.FM.

Now Deep Wealth Nation I know what you're thinking, Jeffrey yeah, on paper it sounds great, but does it work and why would it work?

So let's pull back the curtain and reveal what's actually going on. Because once you understand the mechanics, you stop hoping conversations go well, and you start engineering better outcomes. Here's what most advisors get wrong.

They teach you how to talk, but they do not teach you how people decide. So you end up with entrepreneurs who have great pitches. They're saying all the quote-unquote right things, great decks, great data, and they're still losing the deals, not because the offer is weak, because the conversation is happening at the wrong level.

Every decision is made in two layers, and the science backs this up. The first layer, it's emotional and it's protective. The second layer is logical and justifying. We make a decision based on emotions first, and we justify it with logic later. And the mistake that most entrepreneurs make [00:11:00] is they lead with logic, trying to earn the trust.

But trust doesn't work that way. It's the human condition. People do not, I repeat people do not decide with logic first. They decide with their emotions, what feels right, what feels safe, what's taking care of them.

Understand that the person that you're speaking with when you're sharing something with them before they're asking, hey, is this true?

Their nervous system, they don't even realize this, but their nervous system is asking, is this good for me?

Is this safe for me?

And when they don't feel safe, they rarely will tell you. It's just being kind politically correct, whatever you want to call it.

The other person, they will stall or delay, or they'll say, you know what let me think about it.

Or Can you send me some more information?

Send something in writing to me, or, let me think about this. We're going to compare other options.

But what they're really telling you, not in their words, but in their actions, what they're really saying is, hey, something doesn't feel right. I got to protect myself.

And this is why two entrepreneurs, they're offering the same service at the same [00:12:00] price, getting you the same results. Why you can have two completely different outcomes. One gets the deal, the other, if we're honest about it, they get ghosted. The difference is not the offer. It's not how good their deck looks or the graphics that they're using, or the words that they're using. It's the felt experience of the conversation.

Now, if you're an entrepreneur that, Hey, Jeffrey, if it's not in a complicated spreadsheet, if it's not in a formula, it doesn't exist. I know this sounds woo woo. It sounds frustrating.

How can it be?

Here's what I want you to know.

WII.FM, it works because it creates safety faster than almost anything else that you can ever do in the words that you're saying or in your business or what you're offering. When someone feels understood, the nervous system, it stops scanning you as a threat. It's just built into the human condition. That's our survival mode.

And when that scanning stops resistance drops.

Let me say that again.

When the scanning stops, resistance drops. 

The Six Drivers of Behavior

Jeffrey Feldberg: And so here at Deep Wealth, here's the [00:13:00] one layer that most entrepreneurs miss when they come into the Deep Wealth community that we help them overcome. Underneath almost every decision are six drivers that shape behavior.

What are these six drivers?

People want certainty. They want to know what happens next.

They want control. They don't want to feel pushed. They want to feel that they're in the driver's seat.

They want safety. They don't want regret. They don't want risk.

They want status. They want to feel smart, not sold.

They want simplicity because clarity, not confusion is what they yearn for.

And last but not least, they want progress. They want to feel that this moves them forward.

And by the way, isn't that what you want?

Don't you want certainty, control, safety status, simplicity and progress?

Of course you do.

So why would it be different with anyone else?

And what I love about what WII.FM, what it speaks about is it speaks about these six things.

Certainty, control, [00:14:00] safety, status, simplicity and progress.

Because when you can clearly articulate what someone wants, what they're protecting and what winning looks like for them, not for you, what it looks like for them. That's where the friction melts away like an ice cube on a hot summer day. Friction, it's expensive because friction, it costs you time, margin, energy, and ultimately deals.

So if you're building to keep, WII.FM, this is how you grow your profits without burning yourself out. And by the way, if you're like, Jeffrey, yeah, I want to grow my profits today, but down the road, I want to sell the business. Well, it's the same WII.FM. This is how you create trust that transfers to all of your stakeholders and doesn't just depend on you because buyers, investors, future clients, your existing clients, they don't buy numbers.

They're buying confidence, predictability, and your ability to show them how they're buying [00:15:00] reduced risk.

And WII.FM is one of the fastest ways to reduce perceived risk in every relationship that touches your business. And I'll take it even a step beyond that in every area of your personal life.

The Role of Intention in Conversations

Jeffrey Feldberg: So with all that said, I'm going to reveal a principle that once you know it, you can never unknow it. This principle is incredibly powerful. Let me tell you what this is. I'm going to take it one level deeper because this is where WII.FM, either it becomes a real advantage, a competitive advantage, or it'll completely collapse.

And if it collapses, it does it because of one reason. It's your intention. Your intention is off. You can ask all the right questions. You can use the right language like you're told to use.

From an intellectual side of things you can say, yeah, I understand WII.FM and I'll come at it from an intellectual side of things. But if underneath all of that you're thinking. I need this deal. I need them to say, yes, [00:16:00] I need this to work. People feel it. You are needy. You're sending off the wrong vibe, the wrong vibration.

And I know if you're a logical person, Jeffrey, what is this?

It's not in a spreadsheet. It's not in a formula. What's this woo, woo stuff. I get it. Just stay with me. Because even if you never say what you need, instead of actually what you want, but more importantly what the other person wants, this is why the most powerful person in the conversation, it's the person get ready for this, it's the person who expects nothing in return.

Let me say that one more time.

The most powerful person in any conversation, it's the person who expects nothing in return.

Not because you don't care about results you do. Of course you do. It's because you're not attached to extracting something from the other person.

Think about that.

You're not attached to extracting something from the other person. Here's the paradox. The more you need something from someone. The less they will trust you, the less that person trusts you, the more you're going to try and convince them. It [00:17:00] becomes a negative feedback loop, and the more you try to convince them, the more the other person is going to pull back.

That negative loop has killed more deals than bad pricing, bad timing or bad competition ever has. Let me be precise about what expect nothing in return actually means.

It doesn't mean that you don't want outcomes. Yes, you're an entrepreneur, you're in business to be in business. You're not a charity. It means that you're not emotionally dependent on this one interaction going a certain way. You walk into that conversation with a different internal goal.

It's not how do I get what I want?

Instead, it's how do I help this person make the right decision for them, not for me?

And sometimes making the right decision for them actually doesn't involve you, and you're the first person to point that out. Because when your intention shifts, everything else will follow.

Your tone changes, your pacing slows. You become a better listener. Remember, we have two [00:18:00] ears and one mouth for a reason. You stop rushing, you stop pushing. And the other person, they feel that you genuinely care. They feel safe.

Here's a sentence I want you to use before any high stakes conversation, or in fact really any conversation:

My mission is to serve the truth and to serve this person.

Let me say it one more time.

My mission is to serve the truth and to serve this person.

If this is a fit, great. If it's not, I will leave them better than I found them. And this is expecting nothing in return. And here's what happens. When you operate from that posture, you become the person that people want to talk to because in a world where everyone feels sold, managed, pressured, or handled, to them, you feel different.

You feel calm, you feel clear, you feel grounded, and that matters more than most entrepreneurs can ever realize. This posture creates relationships that compound by compound interest. It's the [00:19:00] eighth wonder of the world. Your customers, they'll stay longer teams, they give you more ownership, you stop leaking energy.

So when you say, I expect nothing, you're not saying this passively. You're saying this because it is powerful. It's being powerful without being needy. And that's the difference between influence and pressure.

Here's a true story, this happened the other day. I was speaking with an entrepreneur and they were talking about the Deep Wealth Mastery Growth Program.

I did my needs analysis on the person asking what they wanted, where they wanted to be, and I could tell that as good as we are here at Deep Wealth, we weren't a fit for this one particular entrepreneur. And I was the first person to say, we're not really a fit for you. This would not work out to your best advantage.

Based on what you're sharing with me here's what you want to try. Try this, go over here, read this, speak to that person. You're likely going to get better results. And it was very pleasant conversation.

But here's what I love about WII.FM. I went into the conversation with not expecting anything. It was all about the other person. And when I left [00:20:00] the conversation, okay, it wasn't about Deep Wealth, it wasn't about growing the business in this one particular case, but I felt I genuinely helped the other person.

Much to my pleasant surprise a week or so later, I get an email and the person who said no to Deep Wealth was introducing me to a friend, a fellow entrepreneur, that they felt Deep Wealth was the perfect fit. So imagine that, someone where it wasn't a fit, that we walked away, we really parted in good company, no expectations on either side, they felt safe, they felt heard.

They felt that they can be themselves, they recommended me to someone else, even though it didn't work out in their particular situation.

And that Deep Wealth Nation, that is a power of WII.FM, when you truly tune in to what the other person wants.

Practical Application of WII.FM

Jeffrey Feldberg: Okay Deep Wealth Nation, I want to switch gears right now. I want to talk to you about something called intention. And you may be saying, well, Jeffrey, yeah, of course. I know what intention is.

Do you?

Just wait, put that on pause for just a moment. Because for most [00:21:00] entrepreneurs you think that you know this is true, even though it probably isn't.

Intention is an invisible language. Let me say that again. Your intention, it's an invisible language to everyone around you. Because people will feel it before you even say one word. Someone may not be able to explain it. They may not even consciously notice it, but they'll respond to it every single time.

And think about yourself. You've experienced this. Someone walks into a room and within a millisecond you already know, hey, this person, they want something from me. They're here to take something from me. I don't trust them. Or this person is here to prove something. They're a know-it-all. Or on the flip side, hey, getting a good vibe. Maybe this person is here to help. I want to hear what they have to say.

But that person never said anything out loud. They never said a word, but you felt it right away. That Deep Wealth Nation, that is intention and that's your intention. Let's be honest with ourselves, and we always are.

Where is your intention most of the time?

And no judgment here. No judgment [00:22:00] whatsoever.

Where is your intention?

Now, some people, they'll try and explain this through psychology, they talk about nervous system attunement, micro cues, tone, pacing, pattern recognition. Others use different language. They talk about energy presence or intention being transmitted before words.

It doesn't matter what label you put on it. What matters is that it shows up in real business outcomes. As an example, as I've often said on the podcast, I don't know how my car works. I don't know how an engine works. I simply go into my car, I push a button, the engine starts, and off I go.

It's the same thing with intention. You don't have to understand the science or what's behind it. You just have to know that your intention, for better or for worse, leaks. What makes it better or what makes it worse, is what your actual intention is. Because subconsciously, you're not even realizing this, your intention, it leaks into your body language. It leaks into how quickly you interrupt or don't interrupt at all. It leaks into whether you're actually listening or just waiting for the first moment that you [00:23:00] can pounce in and show why you're right or why the other person is wrong, or why it should be like this or like that. It leaks into your patience, your urgency, and your silence, or most times lack of silence.

So when you want to walk into a conversation thinking, I need to close this. The other person, you better believe it they are feeling that pressure. Even if you smile, even if you're dressed to the nines, even if you say the right things. And when you walk into a conversation thinking, I want to understand you and I want to help you make the right decision.

That other person feels the space.

They feel safe. They feel your respect and respect is rare.

Remember, given the choice, would you rather do business with a stranger or with a friend?

And of course you're saying, Jeffrey, it's with a friend. Well, why deep Deep Wealth Nation

? Why are you saying you'd rather do business with a friend than with a stranger?

You're probably saying, well, if it's a friend, I trust that person. They've got my back, they want what's best for me. They're going to be honest with me.

[00:24:00] So why would it be any different in a business situation?

Because when it comes to trust, really, it's the highest form of respect. Respect is rare, and this is why WII.FM, it's not a communication technique. Instead, it's being integral. It's an integrity practice. We're mindful of this.

You can fake words. You can fake enthusiasm. You can even fake confidence. We have all heard it. hey, fake it until you make it. What you cannot fake is clean intention for a long period of time. That consistency, that authenticity, and this matters for not only your stakeholders, your existing clients, your future clients, the people in your life.

It matters because we live in a world of high stakes conversations more than ever before. Pricing conversations, performance conversations, partnership conversations, board conversations, growth conversations, exit conversations. You get the point. In those moments. People are not only listening to what you say, [00:25:00] they're listening to what you mean.

They don't even realize that. They're listening to whether you're safe to follow.

So here's what I want you to think about. This is an upgrade for you before your next important conversation, don't just prepare your talking points, prepare your intention. Decide who are you going to be in the room and decide what you want the other person to feel once you leave, because this is what they will remember.

It's not your slides, it's not your fancy graphics. It's not your bullet points. It's not even your words. It's how you made them feel.

Did they feel safe?

Do they feel excited?

Or do they feel like, hey, I'm being taken advantage of here, or, yeah, this person wants something from me. I don't feel comfortable.

So with all of that said, let's get practical because insight, the best strategy in the world without execution, nothing changes. So I'm going to reveal a very simple system that you can use in your very next conversation coming out of this episode. Maybe it's a client's call, a sales call, a team meeting, a board [00:26:00] update a negotiation.

Or on the personal side, you're speaking with a loved one, a family member, a child, a friend, whatever the case may be.

This is not theory. This is a repeatable way to tune into WII.FM in real time.

The 30-Second Reset: Key Questions to Ask

Jeffrey Feldberg: Here's the system.

Part one is what I call the 30 second reset. Before you start any conversation, take 30 seconds out. I'm not saying 30 minutes, 30 seconds.

Do you have 30 seconds?

Of course you do, and I want you to ask yourself three questions.

Question number one, what does this person want most right now?

Question two, what are they trying to avoid?

Question number three from the other person's perspective, what does a win look like from this conversation?

That's it, those three questions. Now, you may be saying, Jeffrey, well, how am I supposed to know all the answers?

Exactly.

That's the point.

Your conversation, it becomes one where you're curious, you're engaged, you're asking the questions, you're learning all about them, what pain points that they have, their particular situation, and in fact, in the Deep [00:27:00] Wealth 9-Step roadmap in Deep Wealth Mastery let's go back to Step 2 X-Factors, one of the X-Factors, it's the magic wand question. This is my favorite question, by the way. This one question helped me go from Embanet 1 to Embanet 2 to create a market disruption, and the question that I asked, it was a client at the time. It was, Hey, from the business side, what's keeping you up at night?

 I asked the question, I stopped talking, I listened. And again, it's that simple. Let me repeat the questions.

Question one, what does this person want most from me?

The next question, what are they trying to avoid?

And really that question is people will do more to avoid pain than to get pleasure.

And the third question, from their perspective, what does a win look like?

So if you do nothing else from this episode, I want you to do this. Ask those questions, take the 30 seconds out.

What does a person want?

What are they trying to avoid?

What does a win look like for them?

Ask those questions before you start the conversation because it [00:28:00] forces you to stop walking with your own internal monologue, running the show, telling them what you think they should do.

It forces you to tune into their WII.FM.

So that's part one.

The WII.FM Question Stack: Five Essential Questions

Jeffrey Feldberg: Part two, I call it the WII.FM Question stack.

Jeffrey, what do you mean?

You just told me some questions. More questions.

Yes there's five questions that will work in just about any conversation and the order by the way, it matters.

So here are the questions.

Question one. This is the priority question. This is where you're asking what's the most important outcome or goal you want from this conversation?

So in other words, what do you want from me in our conversation?

What do you want from me?

We're asking a little bit more politely.

Hey Jeffrey, what's the most important outcome that you want to walk away with from our time together?

Now you stop talking because if you don't know what the outcome is that they want, you're going to be guessing. And guessing is expensive and we don't want to be doing that.

Question two is the pressure question. It's an honest question and you're asking, what is making this harder than it should [00:29:00] be?

This is where the truth shows up. I love it because a lot of times we don't realize what's making something harder than it actually should be. We're so busy doing instead of being, and so the truth shows up when you ask this question, what's making this harder than it should be?

Because people don't take action when everything is fine. They move when something feels heavy or stuck, want, don't you think about something for a second. You're having a terrific conversation, maybe with a friend or a significant other. Everything's going great, and then you remind them of a particular moment where it wasn't great.

All of a sudden, the tone changes. The mood changes. Now the other person is miserable. Maybe they're even yelling at you or they're angry.

Why?

Because you reminded them about something that was difficult, something that they didn't like, something that was harder than what it should have been. It's the same thing when you're asking this question.

People will not take action until they feel the pain. The analogy that I like to give, who wants to go see the dentist?

Hey, and if you're a dentist, no offense to you, but when you wake up in the morning, and you have a terrible pain in your mouth. It's three in the morning. Well, guess what, you're [00:30:00] going to be at the dentist's office before they show up.

You want to be the first patient there because you want that pain to go away. When we can politely remind someone what that pain is that's getting in the way of them moving forward, that's motivation. They want to put that pain away. They want to get it behind them, and that's where question three comes up. So we've identified the pain.

The question three, it's all about risk.

What are you most concerned about that might go wrong right here, right now?

Again, what are you most concerned about that might go wrong?

Now, at this point you may be saying, Jeffrey, you had me up until now. Why would I even want to ask that question?

Hey, that's a normal reaction. I know what you're thinking.

Well, Jeffrey, if I ask about that, why would I want to create doubt?

They're going to tell me why my service, my product, my solution isn't going to work for them.

What's wrong with it?

Why they shouldn't do it?

And in fact, it's actually the opposite. I know the human condition. Wow. It's a marvelous thing. When doubt surfaces, it's already there. They know it. You're just asking them to tell you about it. Because when you [00:31:00] know what that doubt is, when you know what that negativity is, it gives you the opportunity to address it.

Question four is what I call the valve question. You ask, hey, if this gets solved, what does that change for you?

This question moves us from out of what we do and into what they get. Remember, it's not about us. It's all about them.

And then finally, question five is what I call the proof question because you're asking what would make this feel like the right decision for you? Again, what would make this feel like the right decision for you?

Remember, we make decisions based on emotion first, and we justify it with logic later. This is where the real buying criteria lives. Speed, certainty control, social proof, the ability to reduce risk.

That is the station WII.FM. It's not a warning. Do not ask these questions like you're reading from a script, because if you do, it's going to sound fake. It's going to sound mechanical. It's got to be authentic. Imagine you're speaking with a loved one [00:32:00] or a friend. Are you sounding mechanical or are you genuinely interested in helping them out?

That's where you want to be. You want to soften the language, but keep your intent because the intent, this is what makes it work.

Mirror Then Lead: Reflecting and Guiding

Jeffrey Feldberg: And now part three mirror then lead. 

After they answer, mirror back what you heard. You may say something like, Jeffrey, let me share what I am hearing you say. And if I'm off base with any of this, please tell me that I'm off base. I check my ego at the door.

What you want, is this, what you're trying to avoid?

Is that, and the risk that you're worried about is this.

Did I get that right?

And when they say yes, something shifts. And if they say, actually, Jeffrey, no, you missed something. Or Jeffrey having you share that with me, I just realized I forgot to tell you about this other thing that you really should know.

Wow, that is a bonus. That's exactly where we want to be because at this point, when they respond like that, the other person is feeling seen.

And who doesn't want to feel seen?

When we feel seen, when we feel heard, [00:33:00] that's when we stop fighting. It's a human condition. And now you lead. You're not leading with a pitch.

This is where you're leading with the next step.

So now you're saying, well, based on that, here's what I would recommend as a next step.

And by the way, the next step may be no step for you, but a step of the person that you're speaking with going in a different direction, there's nothing to do with you.

Or maybe it's all about you, but you can say so with authenticity, with clarity, and with confidence, because let's talk about what you are not doing.

You're not forcing.

Instead, you're guiding.

This is true leadership. This is where you're developing trust, you're educating.

And as we say here at Deep Wealth, when we educate, we are never selling. No one wants to feel sold. We can educate. We can help. We can mentor.

The Give First Move: Offering Value Without Expectations

Jeffrey Feldberg: Here's part four of the strategy, and I love this. I call it the give first move.

Because this is where you're going to make WII.FM actually stick where they feel heard and seen.

At the very end of the conversation, you want to [00:34:00] offer something with no hook.

Again, no expectations.

You might say something like, whether we work together or not, I'm going to send you something that's going to help you. And then you send one thing, maybe it's a free report, perhaps it's a checklist or a template. Maybe it's a decision filter. It could be a short voice note, an email, an introduction. It could be a warning about a mistake that you see often. There's no judgment that goes along with that.

And here's the key. You really don't expect anything in return. It's not going to be, well, I'm going to send you this free report, or I'm going to send you this checklist, but I absolutely expect that you're going to reciprocate and give me something back.

That's not what you're doing. It's, Hey, here it is. Hopefully this can help and hopefully this can add some value to it.

When you give before that, you get, you stand out from the crowd. Let me ask you something. I want you to go back to a conversation. Actually, two kinds of conversations. One conversation, you're speaking to somebody, they tell you how perfect they are, how incredible their life is, how they're so successful in this area or that area, how they have so many zeros in the bank account.

Well, how do you feel?

You probably feel small. [00:35:00] You probably feel, wow, this person's a real jerk. Now let's have the same type of conversation, but a different context. You meet a person, you're talking with them, and they're pulling you aside and saying, you know what, I got to share something with you. The other day, this happened and wow, did I really fail. I really dropped the ball. I felt terrible. I did this. Looking back, I don't even know what I was thinking. I really felt so low after that, and I just don't know what to do.

Well, I, how do you feel? How are you going to respond?

Well, number one, you're feeling empathy for that person.

Number two, you're probably going to respond back, hey, you know what, don't worry about that. Let me share with you when I did this, wow, looking back, that was probably the stupidest thing I ever did. So don't feel so bad. It's not as bad as you think.

It's human nature when someone opens up first, what some people call vulnerable. And by the way, being vulnerable isn't weak. It actually takes a great deal of strength to be vulnerable. When we're vulnerable with the people around us, that's when they open up.

They feel heard, they feel like they can relate to you, that you're not perfect. You're just like them. [00:36:00] And that's where the trust comes in.

So I have a mission for you.

When you finish this episode, and you're going to finish this episode, right, nudge, nudge, wink, wink when he finishes episode in the next 24 hours, use the 30 second reset and the question stack with one person. I'm not saying a hundred people, I'm not even saying 10 people with one person, and I want you to pay attention.

Does anything change?

I suspect it will. Because once you start hearing WII.FM, not for you, but for the other person, you can't unhear it.

Applying WII.FM Across Stakeholders

Jeffrey Feldberg: Now Deep Wealth Nation, you may be saying, Jeffrey, this all sounds great, but from a business side of things does it work, how am I supposed to put this with all of my stakeholders?

How am I going to do this?

I love that question. Thank you for asking that. What a great question. So let me put this in perspective because WII.FM is not a sales tool. It's a leadership tool. It's a relationship tool, and it shows up differently depending on who you're sitting across from.

Let me walk through five groups quickly, and as I do, I want you to notice which one you've been struggling with most.

First, let's talk about prospective clients, future [00:37:00] clients.

With prospects WII.FM, it's how you stop chasing and how you start closing. Most prospects, they don't disappear because you're too expensive. They disappear because they didn't feel understood or they felt the pressure, or they felt they couldn't see themselves winning. So here's your move. Before you explain anything, ask one question:

What would make this conversation a win for you today?

And then I want you to listen to their station, their WII.FM, nothing to do with you.

Are they trying to grow?

Are they trying to reduce chaos?

Are they trying to protect their reputation?

Are they trying to avoid a mistake?

When you know what the station is and you know how to speak, that's where they share with you the truth is incredibly revealing. And by the way, you may even stumble upon a market disruption, otherwise known in Step 1 Big Picture as an inflection point, a painful problem that they're going through, you never even would've thought of. But now you can begin to address that problem. Help them solve it, [00:38:00] and take that to the world. Take that to the marketplace.

Now, second, your existing clients with clients WII.FM this is how you increase retention, how you can grow the business with the clients, and best of all, have them bring you referrals without being pushy. Once a month, ask a client this one incredibly simple question. Don't confuse simple with simplicity.

What's one thing I could do that would make our business relationship more valuable to you?

That one question it signals something powerful. You're not taking it for granted. Clients who feel that they're not taken for granted, they stay with you. But when a client feels like you don't care about them, that's when they shop around.

When a client feels that you value them, that their business is important, they stay. They grow their business with you.

Third stakeholder. It's your team, otherwise known as your employees with your team members WII.FM. This is the difference between. Compliance and ownership.

Jeffrey, all these fancy words, what do you mean?

Well, many entrepreneurs think [00:39:00] that they have a performance problem. What they really have is a meaning problem.

Jeffrey, what do you mean a meaning problem?

That's crazy. Well, hear me out before you assign a task, when you're speaking to your team member, before you ask them to do something, say something like this, here is why this matters. This is what winning looks like, and here's what I want you to get out of this.

Now your team is not motivated by your stress, or I have to do this because the boss asked me to do this, or I got to do this because my job's on the line.

They're motivated by you being open and vulnerable, your clarity, your pride, your growth, and your momentum. I'll never forget on this very podcast that an entrepreneur shared a story, and the entrepreneur shared how we had a company wide, meaning they were going to lose their biggest client, and the founder got up and he said to the entire team.

If we don't do anything, we're going to lose this client. And I've been up all night, I don't know what to do. I'm lost. I need your help. Why don't we talk about as a team, how [00:40:00] we're going to keep this client. No idea is a silly idea. Let's just put everything out there because obviously keeping this client, it's great for you. It's great for the business, it's great for the client. The client needs us. They just don't understand that at the moment. We're going to show them why we're the best fit for them.

And at the end of the meeting when everyone was going out, the owner wasn't sure. Geez, I don't know.

Did I blow that meeting?

Was it a good meeting?

One of the team members walked up and said, this was the best meeting I've ever been to because you opened yourself up. I feel really important that you trust me enough to ask me for my help. I'm not going to let you down. Wow, what a difference. Compare that to a meeting that it didn't go like this, but he could have said, hey, we're going to lose our client if you want to keep your job, figure out how we're going to keep this client.

Do you see the difference?

So WII.FM, we're tuning into the other person's radio station, and from the team member's side of things, they feel, wow, you trust me. You're sharing this with me. You're opening yourself up to me. It doesn't get any better.

The fourth stakeholder, how about board members and advisors with boards and [00:41:00] advisors, their WII.FM it's how you can get alignment without politics. And here's the question that you can ask.

What are you most concerned about that I might be underestimating?

And when you ask that one simple question, again, don't confuse simple with simplicity. It shows respect and it shows that, hey, if there's something there you want me to know. If you feel that there's a risk going on, I'm open enough to hearing that. I've checked my ego at the door, and this is what great governance is supposed to do. This is why you have them as an advisor, as a board member.

And rounding things out to the fifth stakeholder. Last, but certainly not least, it's your vendors and suppliers. Most entrepreneurs, they treat their vendors like utilities, like they don't matter. But vendors like me, like you, they're humans.

They have constraints, they have targets, they have hopes, they have dreams, they have competing priorities. Here's your question to ask.

What does a great client look like to you?

Ask the question and then be silent, and then whatever they tell you, I want you to be that. In fact, as I'm talking about this in the Deep Wealth 9-Step roadmap, step six, advisory team, one of our [00:42:00] strategies is be the absolute best client for every one of your advisors.

And you ask them what that looks like for them, because it'll be different for every advisor.

When you're the world's best client, what happens?

Why does that matter?

Well, if an advisor, if a vendor, it's the end of the day. They have 10 different phone calls, voicemails, emails that they've got to return, but they can only do one.

If you are the best client, guess who gets that phone call back or that email back?

It's going to be you. When you become easy to serve, you get the VIP treatment, you get better terms, you get faster responses, you get the absolute best people on their team because you're no longer a stranger, you're now their friend.

And we'll give the shirt off our back to a true friend. And that's what you want. And again, you're not doing this for manipulation, you're doing this because you care. You're creating what I like to call a win, win, win. So here's the one common thread across all five scenarios, all five stakeholders.

When you tune into the WII.FM for the person you're [00:43:00] speaking with, people stop feeling sold, managed, handled, or manipulated, and instead they feel heard, seen, and they feel like they're partnering up with you.

And a partnership this is where trust lives. In fact, you can't have a partnership if there is no trust.

Final Thoughts and Call to Action

Jeffrey Feldberg: So with all that said, and I've said a lot, I know, let's begin to bring this home. We're now in the home stretch. You may be asking, Jeffrey, you've said a lot, some terrific strategies I get about what's the bottom line?

Well, the bottom line in a sentence, WII.FM it is always playing. It's always there. It's in every conversation, every relationship, every decision.

Again, the What's In It For Me, and the moment that you learn to truly tune into that station, not for you, but for the other person where you have a clean intention, that's the game changer. Everything changes. You stop working hard and you welcome effortlessness and success into your life. You stop pushing, you stop chasing. You stop [00:44:00] carrying the weight that doesn't belong to you. It never should have been there in the first place.

And the conversations that used to feel heavy, that's where they start to move in this episode.

And Deep Wealth Nation, as we begin to wrap this up, I've got to share with you from my own personal experience, and it's not just me, it is with the thousands that counts of entrepreneurs that I've spoken with when we tune into WII.FM, but for the other person, we're helping them achieve their goals, their dreams, and when we help enough people get what they want over time, and in that order, eventually we get what we want.

I've shared on this podcast how Embanet is the company that never should have succeeded. There was no money, there was no team, there was no experience. But despite that, it went on to massive success.

Why?

I was passionate about what I was doing. I genuinely cared, not about myself, but about the people that I was serving and helping them get to their goals.

Contrast that after my 9-figure exit deal, I started another company. It was all about me. It was all about making more money. Nothing about the [00:45:00] stakeholders. On paper that company should have been a huge success. I had the money, I had the team, I had the experience, I had the success. It was a miserable failure.

Why?

It was my WII.FM that I was tuning into, not theirs. And so as we talk about that, begin to apply this into your life. Think of it as an experiment. Just try it with one conversation. Try it. You're going to see what a difference it makes. You're going to feel better, and when you feel better, you'll want to do more of that.

So let me ask you something.

Did this episode help you?

And I really hope it did. If it helped you, I have a small favor to ask three things.

First, subscribe to the Deep Wealth Podcast on your favorite podcast channel. When you subscribe, you're having the episodes automatically show up, and every episode, it helps you grow your profits. It helps you get to freedom without the fluff. It helps you increase your enterprise value. It helps you welcome success and fulfillment.

Second, why not share this episode with a friend, with a fellow entrepreneur that you really respect. [00:46:00] The kind of person who's great at what they do, but maybe they're carrying more than they should, more than they let on. This could be the one episode that's a game changer for them, and they'll have you to thank for that.

And lastly, tuning into your WII.FM nudge, wink, wink. If you want help to apply this inside of your business, to help you grow your profits, create a market disruption, increase your enterprise value, email me. Email success at Deep Wealth dot com.

You know, success, S-U-C-C-E-S-S at Deep Wealth, D-E-E-P-W-E-A-L-T H.com. Again, S-U-C-C-S-S at D-E-E-P-W-E-A-L-T H.com. Success at Deep Wealth dot com. In the subject line, type in WII.FM. That's it. Send that to us. We'll figure out what's the right fit for you, what that looks like, how our Deep Wealth Mastery program, whether Deep Wealth, Mastery Growth, Deep Wealth Mastery Exit, how this going to help take you to the next level, and I'll leave you with this one last thing.

If you only remember one thing from [00:47:00] today, remember this, the fastest way to grow profit, trust, and welcome fulfillment into your life in a way that you can never have experienced or imagined before.

Walk into every conversation tuning into WII.FM with the clean intention and a genuine desire to help the other person win first.

So there you have it. As we love to say here, Deep Wealth, it's official. This is a wrap. May you continue to thrive and prosper while you remain healthy and safe. Thank you so much and God bless.

So there you have it, Deep Wealth Nation. 

What did you think? 

So with all that said and as we wrap it up, I have another question for you.

Actually, it's more of a personal favor. 

Did you find this episode helpful? 

Have you found other episodes of the Deep Wealth Podcast empowering and a game changer for your journey? 

And if you said yes, and I really hope you did, I have a small but really meaningful way that you can actually help us out and keep these episodes coming to you.

Are you ready for it? 

The dramatic pause. I'll just wait a moment. Drumroll, please. Subscribe. Please subscribe to the [00:48:00] Deep Wealth podcast on your favorite podcast channel. When you subscribe to the Deep Wealth Podcast, you're saving yourself time. Every episode automatically comes to you, and I want you to know that we meticulously craft Every one of our episodes to have impactful strategies, stories, expert insights that are designed to help you grow your profits, increase the value of your business, and yes, even optimize your post exit life and your life right now, whatever you want that to look like.

And every time you subscribe and a fellow entrepreneur subscribe, it's a testament to how together, Yes, we are. We are changing the social fabric of society. One business owner at a time, one liquidity event at a time. So don't let the momentum stop here. Subscribe now on your favorite podcast channel.

You'll never miss an episode. You'll be the first to hear from the top industry leaders, the innovators, the disruptors that are really changing and shaping the business world, and maybe you're commuting, maybe you're at the gym, maybe you're taking a well deserved break that we spoke all about on this episode.

The Deep Wealth Podcast, it's your reliable source [00:49:00] for the next big idea that could literally revolutionize your business. So once again, please hit that subscribe button, stay connected, inspired, and ahead of the curve. And again, your next big breakthrough moment, it might just be one episode away. Maybe it was even this episode.

So all that said. Thank you so much for listening. And remember your wealth isn't just about the money in the bank. It's about the depth of your journey and the impact that you're creating. So let's continue this journey together. And from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much for listening to this episode.

And as we love to say here at Deep Wealth, may you continue to thrive and prosper while you remain healthy and safe. 

Thank you so much. 

God bless.