518 Mitchell Weisburgh

Jeffrey Feldberg: [00:00:00] Some people spend their lives chasing success only to realize they're still trapped by the same invisible limits. Mitchell Weisburgh built his life working around one question. Most high performers never slow down enough to ask.

What if the real ceiling isn't the market, the competition or the economy, but the mind itself?

Mitchell's journey bridges science, leadership, and lived experience. After navigating his own inner battles with self-doubt and identity, he immersed himself in neuroscience, subconscious programming, and emotional regulation to understand why intelligent, driven people so often sabotage their own success.

What emerged was not a theory, but a practical framework for rewiring how leaders think, decide, and perform under pressure. Today, Mitchell is known for helping entrepreneurs, executives, and high achievers break free from patterns they've outgrown. His work challenges the idea that willpower alone creates [00:01:00] transformation and instead replacing it with a deeper understanding of how the brain actually changes.

Through his mind shifting methodology he's helped countless leaders move from burnout to clarity, from hustle to alignment, and from success that looks good on paper to fulfillment that actually feels good. Mitchell's credibility comes not from hype, but from integration. Science meets soul. Performance meets peace. Growth meets truth.

Conversations with him tend to linger longer after the end because he doesn't just offer answers, he invites a more honest relationship with yourself.

And before we start the episode, a quick word from our sponsor, Deep Wealth and the Deep Wealth Mastery Program. Here's Bill, a graduate, who says, the Deep Wealth Mastery Program has transformed the KPIs we're using to accelerate growth and profits.

Or how about Emry, who says, and I love this, and I quote, the Deep Wealth Mastery Program helped me create the right mindset for both growing my business [00:02:00] and later my future exit. I now know what questions to ask, what to do and what not to do, which is priceless. The team and I have found dangerous skeletons and gaps that we're now addressing due to the Deep Wealth program. Today, our actions have a massive ROI. 

Absolutely love that. 

And now, speaking of growth and adding value, check out what Bruce says, and I quote, As a business owner, I'm always looking for new programs, systems, CEO peer groups, and strategies to improve my business. Hands down, the Deep Wealth Mastery program is the absolute best. I'm both growing my business and preparing for a future exit at the same time. It doesn't get any better. 

And I gotta tell you, as I hear these testimonials, this is exactly why I do what I do. My mission, the team's mission here at Deep Wealth, is to literally change the social fabric of society, one business owner at a time and one liquidity event at a time.

Deep Wealth Nation welcome to another episode of the Deep Podcast Deep Wealth [00:03:00] Nation let me ask you this. How is it when it comes to not just the growth of the company, but you as the entrepreneur, as the founder?

How's your mindset?

How's your resilience?

How's the confidence in yourself?

Do you know how you're gonna get from where you are right now to where you wanna get to?

And I know I'm asking a lot of questions. Each one could be an episode in itself. But we have a very special guest in the House of Deep Wealth. We have a fellow entrepreneur, thought leader, someone you're gonna love. So that said, Mitchell, welcome to the Deep Podcast. An absolute pleasure to have you with us.

There's always a story behind the story. What's your story? What got you from where you were to where you are today?

Mitchell Weisburgh: Well, I'm 72 years old. I can begin at 15. I don't think you want me to do that, so I'm gonna begin basically around 2017, 2018. And, so many people were upset, this was just after the election, so a lot of people were upset on both sides of, about the election people were in the US younger people were upset because they were looking at their careers and they couldn't afford to [00:04:00] move outta their parents' houses. And they were really upset. Their parents were upset because, they couldn't get their kids out, but they felt that their lives, everybody hopes that, that generation that follows them is gonna live better. And they were looking at their kids and where are the prospects and people were fighting. there was anger, there was fear. And on the other hand, you look around and, certain people seem to be floating on top. And I'm thinking, there are ways of thought that allow you to succeed in virtually every situation. And then at the same time, I was asked by a university to talk about education technology, and I'm like, you know something, that's not what I wanna talk about. I want to talk about how people who feel successful and are successful succeed despite obstacles. And so I called that.

Since sense making, and I agreed to teach a two day course. And so I did research into psychology, into coaching, into military strategy, into economics, into [00:05:00] cognitive science. I saw all these different pieces, but nobody had put them really together. And I felt. Having read all these different things, that there are three different strands.

One strand is how people control their brains in order to be resourceful and upbeat. Second is how you prepare for situations so that when things don't go right, you're not judging them as failure you're looking at information so that you can continue to move forward.

And third, how do you work with others even when they're getting in your way or they're disagreeing with you? or you don't like them or they're fighting with you or whatever, but somehow or other you can't just walk over them. You have to figure out how you're gonna work with them. And so if you look at those three strands, the resourcefulness, which is your own brain, the resilience, which is about working with situations and the conflict and collaboration, which is working with people.

How do you pull those together into one cohesive body? So I, put that into a two day course. I ended up teaching it to university students as a two day [00:06:00] workshop, and at the end of the two days, the kids stood up and shared and it's okay, now I know this stuff is teachable. I know we're not teaching it to the next generation.

I know a lot of adults don't have this. How do I go about bringing this to the world? Because if we could get a critical mass of people on the planet who were resourceful, resilient, and collaborative. Wouldn't, as, wouldn't they be a lot happier, but also wouldn't we really start solving all these issues that we're just hammering each other on?

And so that became my Mission and really what I'm looking to do, and I know that I can't do this myself, and it may not even happen in my lifetime, but how do we get, let's say 5 million people on the planet who know how to get resourceful? Even when they get down on themselves, who know how to be resilient, even when things aren't going right and who know how to collaborate, even when people get in their way.

and that's what I'm trying to do.

Jeffrey Feldberg: By the way, Deep Wealth Nation, go to the show [00:07:00] notes. We'll have everything in the show notes as a point and click, by the way, pick up the book. Mind shifting. You're gonna love it. And what's going on in there with the strategies. What's interesting about this Mitchell is. I love what you've done because you've taken three areas, resourcefulness, resilience, and collaboration, and Deepp Nation.

I want you to picture each of these as a circle. So resourcefulness is one circle, resilience is another circle, collaboration is another circle, and now Deepp Nation, imagine you're having those three circles, all intersect with one another, and there's one very special point where all three circles have overlapped with one another.

And this is the home or the heart of your system. And so for someone who's just learning about this, what would you want them to know about mind shifting that they probably don't in terms of how it perhaps could help them in ways they thought wouldn't even be possible? I.

Mitchell Weisburgh: I think the crux of it is learning how to tap into the resourceful parts of your brain and taking a step back from that. [00:08:00] It's to understand that the. And this is an oversimplification, but the human brain could be roughly divided into two thinking parts. There's a part that developed earliest in the animals that first learned how to move, millions and millions of years ago.

And that's. We would call the survival brain or the limbic brain. And the whole purpose of that brain is to keep the organism alive so that it can reproduce. And that means recognize danger, take action against that danger really quickly. And that part of the brain, which we would call, say the limbic part of the brain, it activates in hundreds of a second.

And from a human's point of view, actually most decisions are reached by that part of the brain. Then there's a part of the brain that really evolved in mammals, hominids people. Generally we look at the prefrontal cortex, you right behind your forehead as that area of the brain, and that's the part of the brain that can be, think critically, think [00:09:00] creatively.

That's where executive function is. That's where collaboration is empathy, but that part of the brain wakes up two to three seconds after a stimulus. And so when you understand that most of your reactions are occurring in hundreds of a second, and if you're not conscious that these are survival reactions, that becomes your default way of acting.

So we tend to, fight. Flight, freeze. Those are survival reactions, but also doing things that we already know how to do. Our habits are what we're fluent in that we don't have to think about. And then also mimicking what the people around us are doing. So if we're a member, let's say, of a political party and the people around us are thinking like, we absolutely have to do this.

These people are the enemies and we have to fight them, we are mimicking those people. That is a limbic reaction. That is not a. Resourceful way of thinking. If we realize that's a limbic [00:10:00] reaction, we can calm that part of the brain down. Once that part of the brain is calmed down, we can then open ourselves up to other pe, other capabilities.

So I would say the crux of mind shifting is whether it's just controlling our own brain, controlling how we react to situations controlling how we're reacting or responding to other people. It's first understanding our own brains that, hey. 95% of what we do, we're just reacting and we're justifying those reactions.

But we can add a bit of self-awareness. We can recognize when we're in limbic mode, when we're fighting, fleeing, freezing, reacting from habit, or just mimicking other people we can flush. The fear hormones from our brain so that we can access our prefrontal cortex, and then we can be critically thinking.

We can be creative, we can empathize with people. We can align what we're doing to our long-term goals, but only [00:11:00] once we're in that resourceful part of the brain.

Jeffrey Feldberg: And what's interesting about this Mitchell is in the 90 day Deep Wealth Mastery program, we actually go into the science of what you're talking about. Obviously not to the depth that you're going into Deep Wealth Nation, this is real. You don't even realize that you're doing it. So Deep Wealth Nation, next time you're in a conversation.

Become mindful. If you're enjoying the conversation, you're really into it. You're in the flow. As some people say, I want you to take a look at yourself. Chances are if the person across from you, if they're in a certain body position, maybe their hands are on their hips or their hands are folded over, they're just relaxed, sitting back, you're probably doing the same thing.

Or if they're hunched over on the table and they're. Hence are together. You're probably doing the same thing as well. We tend to mirror each other. We don't even realize this, and I know in sales 1 0 1 being a sales professional myself, that's one of the things that the sales masters will often teach.

Hey, whoever you're sitting across, mirror them. If they're talking slowly like this, we're talking slowly like that. If they're talking fast like this, you're talking fast like that and [00:12:00] you're mirroring what they're doing. Not in a manipulative way, but in a way to. Have some commonality, have the other person feel comfortable so that we can take the conversation to the next level.

And so Mitchell, I'm wondering when you looked at what you're doing with the whole mind shifting and then you took it to yourself as that data point of one in the beginning. What did you see that perhaps for years it was quietly limiting your growth? Whatever belief that was, that the mind shifting helped you break free of that and say, you know what?

That never really applied. I didn't realize that I was applying it to myself and wow, look what I can do now.

Mitchell Weisburgh: I'll say that there were so many lessons in my life that each of them contributed to an area of mind shifting. And I'll just go back to one time where I, so I had a partner who I had not chosen, but anyhow, it was him and me basically running the company along with my dad actually. And I knew this partner [00:13:00] had to go.

And so one of the aspects of mind shifting is when you're dealing with a conflict there's five different ways of dealing with the conflict. One of which is this compete for methodology, which is, you're just telling the other person what they have to do. You don't really care what their reaction is.

You're not gonna react to them. You're gonna tell them what they're gonna have to do. And so I learning that and learning that It was my job to tell him that he was leaving, not to negotiate with him, not to find out what his reasons were, not to do any accommodation, not to do any compromising, but the number one thing I had to establish was he was leaving the company basically, that as of that day, he was no longer going to be co-running the company with me.

And and so that's, an aspect of mind shifting and I was able to do that now. The next step was negotiating with him, what his severance package was. and I did an absolutely, I probably did the worst job of anybody in the history of negotiation in that we [00:14:00] began with I know this, was hard for you.

And just understand that what I want to do is to be fair. Well, what I didn't know at the time. Was that when you are negotiating with another person, if that other person is using that, the compete style, if they are trying to get the maximum that they can get out, you can't collaborate. You can't negotiate 'cause anything that you say is going to be taken as weakness.

And so you have to also establish what you know, what your bottom line is. And so at the end of that negotiation he ended up dragging it out for six months. Uh. The whole time he was on salary not working. He negotiated a six month severance where we paid him. He negotiated buyout of his stock at a rate that was much, much higher than what he deserved.

And when we signed the papers and I handed over the check and he was like 12 years older than me, he puts his arm around his shoulder and he says, Mitch, [00:15:00] I'm gonna tell you something. That. I'm gonna tell you this because I like you. He says, when you were negotiating with me, I knew I had you within two minutes because you said, what I want to do is I want to be fair.

He says, I had no. No intention of being fair at all. He says, I was gonna get the maximum I could from you and I did. Basically I soaked you and I soaked you because you said that you wanted to be fair. He says, when you're negotiating with another person, you have to understand their mindset. As well.

if you had understood my mindset was not to be fair, it was up to you to come up with something and just do it. Which is actually what my lawyers had told me all the time. But I'm like no. I wanna be fair with him. you know, he's saying this comment is outta place.

You gotta. to rewrite the whole contract. So we rewrote the contract, put the comment in place, all these different things. And they kept on saying Mitch, just tell him he's gone and this is the amount. No, I wanna be fair, we're negotiating. But I learned from that [00:16:00] negotiation and I learned from what he basically told me, is that you gotta understand there's five different styles, what your styles are your normal go-to.

And that's, part of what we teach in mind. Shifting when to use each style. how to react to other people when they're in that style and how to use those styles from a resourceful point mindset versus using those styles from a limbic or fear-based mindset. So that was a very expensive lesson, but I've used that lesson for over 30 years.

Jeffrey Feldberg: What a powerful lesson, not one that you necessarily would've signed up for, let me ask you this. So now that you went through that, and my goodness, the feeling afterwards, and by the way. We've all been there. Every entrepreneur who hasn't been there is lying to him or herself. We've all been there and I know when I first got into business, yes, I want to be fair to everyone and I want them walking away.

Jeffrey's a great guy. And listen, it's great intentions. The outcomes always don't match up to that. So having said that, and now with the system, so we're gonna fast forward, you're looking back at that. What would you have done differently because you [00:17:00] laid out perfectly. How things went when you didn't know any better.

You just thought, okay, I'm gonna be fair and I'm gonna listen to the other side, and whatever they say. If it seems good to me, I'll do that. What would you have done differently with the system that you've now created mastered and you're sharing with us?

Mitchell Weisburgh: Well, in the case of the negotiation with him, I would've basically, I had the company appraised by a professional appraisal company and and he gave me all these. Is why I was wrong and all, I would've just basically come back and said, look, this is the appraisal. This is the amount.

If you sign within two weeks, this is the amount. If not, sue me. Okay. and I'll see you in court and we will, negotiate that way. But, I would've just come up with amount that I could live with because, for me, I would never want to enter into negotiation where I felt I was taking advantage of another person.

So I would've come up with an amount that I felt that was a reasonable amount, and that's it. Knowing that he was gonna fight, it didn't matter what he [00:18:00] said, it was like, this is fair. I understand that anything that he said was only to get me to change the number. Not to be fair.

This is the amount. This is it, period. Just stuck. It stuck to it.

Jeffrey Feldberg: And Mitchell, as we're talking about this, I am thinking back to a number of instances where I did exactly what you did back in the day, even though it was further into my entrepreneurial journey. Where, how did you stuck to my guns and what everyone else around me was telling me, but no, I'm gonna be fair.

I'm gonna do this. It actually couldn't have turned out worse, 

Mitchell Weisburgh: Think of sales situations. many years later, I'm in a sales situation and we had come up with what we needed to do for this company and the amount, and let's just say that it was, I don't know, $750,000 job. And they come back and they say, we really like you.

We like what you do and we want you to do it for $500,000. And really, if we were in a service business, so it's not we couldn't do it. I could have made the decision or negotiated with them and it was like, learning the lessons of mind shifting.

It's no, let me just [00:19:00] come back to what I really feel is right. And what I really felt was right was $750,000. And basically I came back and said, you know something, the most important thing for your company right now is to get this done and get this done. In the time that you want it. And I put my best effort into coming up with how we can do that.

And I can understand if that's not what you want and you move to somebody else, but if you want us to do it, this is the amount that I feel that we need to get in order to do it in the way that you want it done. And the salesperson on the job looked at me and she was like, she just turned white.

'cause she thought I had just canceled the sale right there. And. It probably only took three or four seconds, but it just seemed like it took a minute and a half and the guy came back. He says, well, I think that's fair. Okay. And we went forward.

Jeffrey Feldberg: You know what's interesting about the human condition? It's natural. Hey, we're gonna give some pushback. I want the absolute best I can do. I wanna feel like I'm walking away with something, but they've gotta hear a reason. I don't know why. The human mind is [00:20:00] just an incredible thing. I'm thinking of an experiment that has always stayed with me and the psychologists, they went to a library.

This is back in the day where you, we didn't have the internet. We didn't have these personal home printers, and there's a lineup for the photocopy machine.

They tried a few different things. One of the times a person would go up and say, I'm so sorry, I just have these few pages to photocopy.

I don't have a lot of time. Do you mind if I go in front of you? They wanted to bud and for a lot of people that drives them nuts. They want Bud, but because they gave an explanation more times than not. Yeah, sure. Go ahead. I get it. Then they also tried, it was interesting where someone just said, would you mind if I just went in front of you?

And again, more times than not sure, go ahead. And it was just the very simple act of asking that somehow put people off as opposed to just going in there and doing it. And I'm just gonna go in front of you. And so it almost seems as though we're hardwired to want to help people. We just have to know how to verbalize that, how to get that across in a way, what you did.

Hey, I hear what you're saying, but what's more [00:21:00] important for you is not, the $500,000 is doing it the right way in the time that you have. And this is from what I feel. The best way to do it. And so you gave him the rationale. Okay. Yeah, sure, Mitchell. Okay. Thought about it. Go ahead and do it. So let me ask an unfair question because with the question I'm about to ask, you'd be right to say, Hey Jeffrey.

Every company, every entrepreneur, every founder, they're on their own unique journey. But that said, I know we're all different, but generally speaking was one of my favorite questions. It's the Fritos law. It's the 80 20 principle. When you're working with entrepreneurs, I know you're out there, you're speaking to entrepreneurs, and they're coming to your talks and with your books and you're coaching, you're masterminds, everything else that goes along with that.

From an entrepreneurial perspective, are you seeing some patterns that, Hey, yeah, Jeffrey, for entrepreneurs. 80% of these challenges over here are coming from 20% of the same actions, lack of actions that are right over here. So the 20%, that's the root cause is creating 80% of the same challenges again and again.[00:22:00]

Are you seeing a pattern like that?

Mitchell Weisburgh: That is such an unfair question and I'm just gonna refuse to answer it. Forget it. Okay. So, 80 per. I think that one of the things that really does a factor in virtually all people who are entrepreneurs is you have to be able to be certain and come up with a direction and go for it, you have to have a certain amount of self-confidence. Having said that, when a person is absolutely sure of something, that's a sign that person is making the decision from their limbic brain, not their resourceful brain. The limbic brain is binary. There's a right way, there's a wrong way, and that's it.

And so as an entrepreneur, when you are sure that this is what you have to do, this is how you have to treat this person, this is what you have to do to this product, then that's a sign it could be that whatever you've come up with is really the right thing to [00:23:00] do, but it's a sign that you reach that from your limbic brain, from your survival brain, fear-based rather than resourceful.

And that's, like a sign that says, well wait a minute. That's my limbic brain. Let me first calm that part of the brain down, and then let me come up with three other alternatives. once you have the three other alternatives, it's chances are that what you end up doing is actually not one of those three alternatives or your original thing.

It's a mashup of all the different things but. Data shows that when decisions are reached from three or more alternatives, they're substantially better than they are from one or even two alternatives. But they also show that 70% of all decisions are the first thing that pops into the decision maker's mind.

Jeffrey Feldberg: And so as you're saying that, I'm thinking back to myself, and I know I'm not alone with this. So many entrepreneurs we're type A personalities, Jeffrey. I'm just gonna [00:24:00] grind it out. Even listen to the words I'm using, grind it out all this time and this effort. So there's always that sweet

Mitchell Weisburgh: Can I just stop you a second because you used the term grind it out and that is another sign that you're in limbic mind because if you're thinking that you have to get to your grit and put up your backbone and do something, then basically something in you is giving you a warning that there are alternatives.

And that's a good point to take a step back and say, wait a minute, what are some real alternatives in this? And I'm sorry to interrupt, but it was like as soon as you said that.

Jeffrey Feldberg: That was exactly my question. My question was, at what point does our grit no longer become a strength and now it actually becomes a weakness or a self portrayal, or just because I've always had to grind it out or I've had this grit, I'm always gonna do it that way. When do we recognize that? How do we recognize that?

Mitchell Weisburgh: Yeah. grit is because you're sure that something has to be done a certain way and you're going to do it, and that takes a lot of energy. And while you're [00:25:00] putting the energy into that, you're not putting your energy into other things. So the fact that you have to grid it out is probably a sign that some part of your brain emotionally is telling you, you know something, maybe this isn't the right way to do it.

Now you might be able to grindin it out, and that may be a good enough way to get it done. But if you can take a step back and say, well, wait a minute, what are other people doing? What are some alternatives? Do I have to, let me just take 15 seconds or 30 seconds to have a pause. Or if it's a big project, let me just take.

Overnight to think about what else could I possibly do? And by opening up your mind rather than closing it off to that one course of action, you'd be surprised how many times you're gonna come up with, wow, something. There are a couple other ways of handling this. I could pay somebody else to do it.

I could, this is actually a problem that's gonna go away in a couple days. there's people on my staff who could really handle this. This is. Maybe, [00:26:00] yes, this person is doing this task wrong, but by doing it wrong, it's not putting the company in danger.

And they're gonna learn more by doing it wrong than by me telling them the right way to do it. So, but you start it off with this thing like, I have to do this, I have to grid it out. That's a sign you're in your limbic mode and that might be the right thing to do, but you'll end up being.

Much more effective if you can take your a step back and consider alternatives.

Jeffrey Feldberg: I wanna take a look at what you're saying now, and I love what you just shared with us. And when we look at mind shifting, there's a saying out there and it's been around for a reason. Don't shoot the messenger because back in the day, that's literally what would happen. You'd be the bearer of bad news and you get shot or killed way back, and it's not that far back in human evolution.

And so now let's fast forward to the workplace environment. A,

either as a leader or I'm the giver of feedback, or I'm on the receiving end of the feedback. For most people, particularly if it's, [00:27:00] not necessarily the best kind of feedback of, Hey Jeffrey, you really screwed up here.

Or, Hey Jeffrey, let me tell you of where things went offline here. How, through the mind shifting, what would you want me to know to be able to really hear that better? To either deliver it better or to receive it better? Because for most people, it brings 'em down. They just shut down. They don't listen.

They get angry or they lash back out, and it's a loss opportunity.

Mitchell Weisburgh: Let's first talk about the receiver of the information. 'cause the receiver of information is probably the decision maker, but I really do want to get to the giver of the information also. 'cause sometimes we're also giving information and thinking of these other people. But in terms of being the receiver of the information, thinking in advance that the most valuable, part of decision making is getting information in a timely fashion, and if the information is valuable, then you also need to understand that by [00:28:00] attaching rewards or punishments that information, you will never get the information straight. So to look at your systems and say, how valuable is this information to my ultimate decision making?

so you wanna encourage the information flow. And to do that, you can't reward or punish the information. And when you have that train of thought you're thinking about. Your system's designed the way you're talking to people, the way you're rewarding people, the way you're punishing people for the purpose of getting the information as quickly and as accurately as you can.

Jeffrey Feldberg: Okay, and so can you walk us through how we best approach that? And by the way, Deep Wealth Nation in the show notes, Mitchell was kind enough. He sent me this terrific PDF, and it has a whole number of scenarios and there are some terrific questions that are there at how to approach things. For someone who's listening though, can you just give us.

Some tips or some insights. We have a difficult situation here. [00:29:00] Perhaps someone really dropped the ball. It's a team member, maybe even a senior team member. They really dropped the ball, didn't do what they wanted to do. My initial reaction, that limbic reaction, I just want to tear their head off and rip into them.

Let them know that I'm the boss and how disappointed I am and how they really screwed up. And you can fill in all the other explicitives that said, though, we don't wanna be doing that. We want to take it and have it as a leadership moment. So with mind shifting, how can we leverage this both for myself?

In terms of delivering that, but also for the receiver.

Mitchell Weisburgh: If our first inclination is that we wanna rip our heads off again, that's fight, flight, freeze. Okay? That's the fight. Okay? And so, you know that's limbic reaction, and it could be that is the right reaction actually, because maybe this person screwed up in a way and you need to, you know, the best course of action for your company is to make such a spectacle of this, that nobody does anything the same way.

So, it could be that's the right thing. But if you really want to be resourceful about it is to pause and then [00:30:00] think back to your, the values that you want and the goals that you want for the company, and then what are some actions that I take that, given that this already happened, we'll move the company forward.

The way I want to move the company forward. Now, could be that you need to get together with people to figure out what caused the situation to go wrong and develop the system so that doesn't go wrong again, and that may be a lot more effective than punishing the person who's screwed up.

But you can't do that. if your reaction is to punish the person because what, basically what you're telling everybody else is if you screw up this way, you're better off hiding it or getting another job as quickly as possible. But don't tell the boss because you're gonna get screwed. Okay. So, you come back and say, well, okay, if is something that happened, we lost our second biggest account and I really wanna take the salesperson. and get rid of them is getting rid of the salesperson. The best thing for the company [00:31:00] or is are there other things that we could do that will be better for the company? And then I might come to the conclusion, well, probably this salesperson has been a really good salesperson for a long time.

Maybe there's lessons from this that other people can learn. Well. So if you want to use that for lessons then you want to approach the other person and the group of salespeople with an inquisitive mind. And so one of the things that's taught in the conflict, in collaboration book, in the conflict in collaboration course is it's motivational interviewing, which is a way of asking people questions to uncover.

The person's own understanding of what happened and what should happen, so that the solutions are coming from the other people. And so, developing the ability to use those motivational interviewing questions with that person or with other salespeople to figure out how do we stop this from happening again and possibly even, how can we go back to this account?

And approach the account [00:32:00] and show them what we've learned and get another chance with that account. Because as entrepreneurs, I think every one of us has found that sometimes our strongest connections with customers happen after we've screwed up. And we've showed them how we've made everything right, how we've acted with integrity.

Jeffrey Feldberg: Absolutely. And as I was going through the materials that Mitchell, as I was preparing for today, when I read about your methodology and I saw how you're approaching it. It reminded me a lot of what some people call the Socratic method where we are asking questions, becoming curious, and it actually put me on memory lane because I went back in my own entrepreneurial journey with, on the surface what could have been the absolute most terrible moments that could be in the entrepreneurial journey.

And to your point, I remember this one time. From my e-learning company, Enette, we had just begun to work with this brand new school and one of the faculty members said some fairly nasty things about not only the company, but myself as well. And it would've been very easy to just say something [00:33:00] back or, okay, I'm gonna show this person.

I actually called the person up and said, Hey. It's Jeffrey, I read about what you said or heard about what you said, and I'm just curious. I want, did I say something to offend you? Did I do something? Not just, I'm just curious. I really wanna understand your position. And it was from that curiosity. And by the way, it was hard for me to say that I was all riled up and I'm gonna show this person.

Anyways, long story short, I understood that position. They begun to understood my position. It was just a misunderstanding, a simple communication, misunderstanding. This person turned around and became our biggest raving fan from our biggest hater to our biggest raving fan.

Mitchell Weisburgh: so, so much of what you did is embedded in mind shifting because you couldn't have had that conversation if you hadn't done some internal work. To get curious instead of angry. So by first becoming curious, you could then ask the questions. the next part about it is that we all have these mirrored [00:34:00] neurons, people.

And so the mirror neurons are what compels us to copy other people, to act like other people, to learn from other people. And by you showing curiosity and asking questions and being vulnerable. the other person's mirror neurons, maybe not initially, but eventually are working on them to be curious and open and vulnerable, and then at that point where you're both curious and vulnerable, you're connected and you're able to then walk.

Forward and look at the situation. So it no longer becomes me against you, but here's the situation. How do we overcome the situation? And that's what happens when you're using, mind shifting with another person to collaborate, even though it starts with a conflict.

Jeffrey Feldberg: And that's the one interesting thing, Mitchell, as I was thinking about mind shifting, I was preparing for today, again, going down memory lane for myself. I thought about all the guests on the podcast, incredible guests, very successful leaders in their [00:35:00] own right in all. Kinds of different industries, none of them really alike.

I got to know them through conversations like this offline, online, and the more I thought about it, the really successful people, the incredible guests that had these illustrious careers, and they're out there, they're really making a difference. And a lot of it is what you're talking about with mind shifting.

They were curious. Hey, why is it like this or this didn't happen? Let me find out. Let me become curious. They didn't assume. We all know what they say about assume, but it was that curiosity, which means checking the ego at the door. Developing a tough skin because you're probably gonna hear some things that you're not gonna like.

Really being humble and getting out there and listening and speaking. One of my very early mentors, Jeffrey, we've all been given two ears, one mouth for a reason. Talk less, listen more, and the mind shifting is just amazing in terms of when we can master this.

It does set us up for so much success. It's always been there. We just haven't had the key [00:36:00] to unlock that. I would love your thoughts about that.

Mitchell Weisburgh: I think. That curiosity. When you know that you're curious, then you're in your sage, your resourceful parts of the brain when you know you're sure, when you're angry, when you're upset, when you're fearful. Those are all parts of your limbic survival system, and again, things are binary. There's a right way and there's a wrong way.

And really three things that we can do as individuals to pull ourselves from that. The first step has to be self-awareness. If we're not aware that we're in limbic mode, then we can't get out of it. So when we're angry to be able to have the thing, you know, something. I'm angry right now. The metacognition meta thought to be able to think about the way you're thinking.

So that's the first thing. And very often that's enough. It's oh my gosh, I was angry. I don't have to be angry. And you can change. So very often that's not enough. And so another thing that we can do is to distract ourselves long enough. For our [00:37:00] stress hormones to dissipate from our brain.

if everything's going it takes 60 to 90 seconds for those stress hormones to flush out of our brain. maybe we can be mindfulness. We can pay attention to our breath. if we don't have the luxury of just being able to breathe, maybe we can just focus on the color of the other person's eyes.

Maybe we can just focus on the way that they're speaking. If we can take a break, maybe we can go for a walk. Maybe we can listen to music, maybe we can work out, but something to distract the brain that limbic part of the brain calms down and the stress hormones leave, and so we can access our prefrontal cortex.

And then the third is. Positive self-talk. Positive self-talk isn't the self-talk. Come on, you can just work harder. Okay. That's operating at the, limbic level. I wonder what else I could do. Or, this person said this and they're probably wrong, but what if they're 10% right.

Okay. What if there's some kernel of what they said that I can learn something from? And so tho you know, that positive [00:38:00] self-talk that opens us up and there's a, this is. The first book, which is mind Shifting, stop Your Brain From Sabotaging Your Happiness and Success. that book has 50 different techniques on how to get yourself out of that, limbic brain.

But it's, it boils down to three basic ones. It's this, it's the self-awareness. It's being able to change your focus or distract your brain, and it's being able to ask yourself the questions that open yourself up. And then there's a fourth thing because sometimes. Us as individuals can't do it for ourselves.

And sometimes we need somebody else who's knowledgeable about asking the questions. And so, if you read the book or as part of a group, you could always turn to another person, a part of the group and say, I'm having this issue. And they could say, well, let me just turn to page 65 of the book and let me walk you through this technique and that'll be enough.

Just hearing it from another person. And I do that because I get sometimes in these SNS and I can't get myself out and. I have some friends I can call. I have, [00:39:00] my kids are adults, so I can call my son. I can call my daughter. The one person I can't talk about this is my wife, because she's gonna get me back down into limbic.

That's true with all of us, right? With the our spouses are our best friends, but sometimes we just need somebody else. So my kids, my friends who know the techniques. If you have a therapist, if you have a coach, those people, sometimes you just need another person to walk you out of it Also.

Jeffrey Feldberg: And so as you're describing that, and again, I know every individual founder, entrepreneur, business owner is different, they're gonna be reacting differently. But as you think about mind shifting, is there one part of it that's the most challenging for people that you find? Generally speaking? Not specifically over here and there, but generally speaking, sure.

70%, maybe 90% of people, once they can overcome this, whatever this is, the door opens and the results just flood on in a very positive way.

Mitchell Weisburgh: I think that the one thing for people to overcome is when they start hearing, let's say me talk about it, or other people talk about mind shifting, they immediately think, oh [00:40:00] my gosh, does this person need it?

And what they don't think is, oh my gosh, I could really use this. And so that, I think is the number one thing is they're thinking about all the people who could really use this.

they're not looking in the mirror because it's, we are all human beings. Nobody, when I reread the books, I learned something. Each time I reread the book, it's oh my gosh, yeah, I forgot about this. That's true. So it's like Throughout life, we need to be constantly improving our ability to be able to be more resourceful, to be able to overcome obstacles, to be able to work with other people.

And we need to do the work, my books or my newsletter or my courses, our three ways to do it. There's other people who also coach in, they call it different things, but but taking that journey and not thinking, wow, something. If my wife only knew this boy, would my life be a lot easier?

No. If you knew it, your life would be a lot easier.

Jeffrey Feldberg: Exactly. It goes back to that old saying, be the change in other people that you want to [00:41:00] see. And as the leader of the company, as the founder, you've gotta walk the talk. You've gotta go through it first, start doing it yourself, and hey, it shows you're vulnerable. Guys, I'm trying. In this new system, I'm probably not gonna be perfect.

I'm just giving you the heads up. I'm gonna try it for myself. If I like it, I'll talk to you about it, but only first. Once I go through it, I'll tell you all about it of how it works for me.

Mitchell Weisburgh: This is going back at least 15 years, but I have a niece I have a number of nieces, but this niece was 18 years old. She had barely graduated high school. She dropped out of college before taking the first course.

She moved in with a guy who was about 12 years older than her. She became pregnant. She had the baby. She couldn't hold a job. The guy left and so I decided, something, I can't just do nothing. So I do some research into different things that she could possibly do.

I call her in, arrange a meeting for her. She comes to our house and, the first thing I said was, you're a good person and you deserve to have a good life. And she just broke out into tears. Okay. And then we went through the [00:42:00] different things that, that I had done the research that she could do, and she chose this course.

In California and I, the course was taught in New York as well, but it's like, no, I think that you need to get away to be able to take this so that you don't so easily have the people telling you all these negative influences. And she, she was like, oh yeah, this would be great.

I'll go out to California. So we paid to have a babysitter take care of her daughter. We paid for her to go out to California to take the course. She gets to California, She starts the course and after an hour she takes all the money. She doesn't go to the course again. She goes to the beach, she finds some friends, she parties all weekend and she comes back.

And I was telling this to a friend of mine and the course that I had and I booked her, was a course called, the Landmark Forum course, and this friend of mine says, well, of course, you can't tell her to take the course if you haven't taken the course yourself. You've gotta walk the talk.

If you want to other people to take the course, you have to go through it, and you have to be able to talk to them about [00:43:00] the course. So. I then go through the landmark program and sure enough, I have other nieces and nephews who fall into into situations.

But, you know, something, every single one of them. Because I had already walked the talk, they went through the entire course themselves also. And I think that was a huge lesson for me.

Jeffrey Feldberg: Absolutely. We have to say, Hey, been there, done that. How can I ask somebody to do something that I've never done myself, and I know for myself, fortunately, either came naturally or I had some terrific mentors with my father and my uncle, both incredible entrepreneurs in their own right, that I saw that for themselves.

He is incredibly successful. Men who were doing what some people say, why are you doing that? That's below you. And if they were here, sadly both of 'em have passed. They would say, well, of course I did that one. I had to understand how it worked and I wanted to understand, and I wanted to know what it was like so that when I asked someone to do it, I knew exactly what was going on.

And what's interesting, Mitchell, when I haven't done that, when I went against everything that I knew of what not to do, but I did it anyways. Other [00:44:00] people can detect it. The BS detector on the other side went off and now they're pulling the wool over my eyes because I have no frame of reference and I have to take what they're saying at face value.

I can't do a Ronald Reagan of trust, but verify. I have nothing to verify it with because I haven't been there so much. Truth to what you're saying. Mitchell, let me ask you this. Is there an important question I haven't yet asked that you'd like to get out there?

Mitchell Weisburgh: I would say my mind shifting is not a replacement for therapy. And so if a person needs therapy, But I will say that I've heard from quite a few people in therapy that after they've read these books, they're much better able to understand what their therapists are telling them.

they're understand earlier when they themselves become dysregulated. And so they read. It's like, oh my God, I can feel my limbic system rising. Okay. This is a time for me to foresee if I can calm myself down, and if I can't, this is a time to call my therapist before [00:45:00] it gets so serious that I have to be hospitalized.

Jeffrey Feldberg: Absolutely, and I have to tell you, I don't want to get it on my social media soapbox because that could be not just an episode, an entire series. In a day and age, unfortunately, where the up and coming generation, they have been schooled on five or ten second soundbites, and that's their world. That's the reality.

Communication plays no part of it. As a leader, a founder, business owner is really an opportunity here, not only for myself, I internalize this. I master this for my own life. I can out like you're doing, take this out to others and show them, hey, there's an incredible world that's out there that doesn't fit into a ten second soundbite that you can enjoy.

The world can truly be your oyster. You need to know how to interact, how to communicate, and how to be with other people. Especially today as you read the headlines not great. It's polarizing and people feel so lonely and all kinds of crazy things are going on. It doesn't have to be that way. I love what you're doing with mind shifting, and so do [00:46:00] both Nation, please pick up the book, click on the show notes, all kinds of resources there.

You even put together some scenarios there of we can watch and see what's going on. You've done all the heavy lifting for us. So all that said, it's a great segue to go into our wrap up mode and Mitchell, it is my privilege and honor here on the Deep Wealth Podcast. It's our tradition where every guest I ask the same question.

It's a really fun question. Let me set this up for you. When you think of the movie Back to the Future, you have that magical DeLorean car that will take you to any point in time. It's tomorrow morning, you look outside your window, and this is the fun part. Not only is the DeLorean car curbside, the door is open.

It's waiting for you to hop on in what you do, and you're now gonna go to any point in your life, Mitchell, as a young child, a teenager, whatever point in time it would be. What would you tell your younger self in terms of life lessons or life wisdom, or, Hey Mitchell, do this, but don't do that. What would it sound like?

Mitchell Weisburgh: I'd go back and I would say, you know something, you're gonna [00:47:00] live a happy life, and so just relax and things will come the way they'll come. But you'll survive and thrive. matter what, and that's what I would tell myself. Yep.

Jeffrey Feldberg: I love that it's hey, you're gonna have a happy life anyway, so just relax, enjoy the journey. You'll survive. Not only you're gonna survive, you're gonna thrive. Enjoy the journey. Relax. I absolutely love that. It is wisdom for the ages and Depap Nation. Take that with you Before you go into your next meeting, depap Nation or your next activity, think about that.

Hey, let me enjoy the journey. I'm gonna not only survive, I'm gonna thrive no matter what is going on. And that said, Mitchell, someone in Nation, they wanna speak with you. They have a question, maybe they want some coaching or some mentoring. Have you come in, speak to their company?

Where would be the best place online to reach you?

Mitchell Weisburgh: There's two places. I have a free newsletter, we send it out once a week and that's mindshiftingwithmitch[dot]blog. And so if you go there, you can take a look at the newsletter and you can [00:48:00] sign up. And then there's also. mindshiftingwithmitch[dot]com and there's a link to the newsletter from there.

And there's a link to the website from the newsletter. But mind shifting with mitch.com has a way for people to get in touch with me. It has summaries of the books and the different chapters in the books summaries of the different courses, and so you can really get in depth understanding of what mind shifting is about.

If you go to the mind Shifting with mitch.com or center up for the newsletter, mind shifting with mitch.blog.

Jeffrey Feldberg: And the Great News Nation is all in the show notes. It doesn't get any easier. It is a point and click. Well, congratulations. It's official. This is a wrap, and as we love to say here at Deep Wealth, may you continue to thrive and prosper while you remain healthy and safe. Thank you so much.

Mitchell Weisburgh: Well, thank you Jeffrey. And I'm in awe of all the free resources that you offer people and that comes from a very powerful personality that you are and a deep desire to see the world be a better place. So thank you for everything that you're doing.

Jeffrey Feldberg: Thank you Mitchell. You're having me blush, but you're welcome and [00:49:00] thank you. I appreciate that. God bless. Have a terrific day.

Mitchell Weisburgh: You too. 

Jeffrey Feldberg: So there you have it, Deep Wealth Nation. 

What did you think? 

So with all that said and as we wrap it up, I have another question for you.

Actually, it's more of a personal favor. 

Did you find this episode helpful? 

Have you found other episodes of the Deep Wealth Podcast empowering and a game changer for your journey? 

And if you said yes, and I really hope you did, I have a small but really meaningful way that you can actually help us out and keep these episodes coming to you.

Are you ready for it? 

The dramatic pause. I'll just wait a moment. Drumroll, please. Subscribe. Please subscribe to the Deep Wealth podcast on your favorite podcast channel. When you subscribe to the Deep Wealth Podcast, you're saving yourself time. Every episode automatically comes to you, and I want you to know that we meticulously craft Every one of our episodes to have impactful strategies, stories, expert insights that are designed to help you grow your profits, increase the value of your business, and yes, even optimize your post exit life and your life right now, whatever you want that to look like.

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So all that said. Thank you so much for listening. And remember your wealth isn't just about the money in the bank. It's about the depth of your journey and the impact that you're creating. So let's continue this journey together. And from the bottom of my [00:51:00] heart, thank you so much for listening to this episode.

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God bless.